Where are your pleasant days, your gentle rains? Why do you bring us hot, dry days and late summer flowers?
June, this is not funny.
Yes, Dr. Hortfreud?
Why are you writing to a month of the year like that?
Was I writing to a month of the year? Oh, I guess I was. I guess the heat and lack of rain are getting to me.
I have some advice for you, Carol.
Am I going to like it?
Maybe, at least I hope so. My advice is to water to keep your plants alive, but don't water to make them look like June.
You mean I should watch how much I water?
Yes, because it looks like this is going to be one of those long, hot summers. Pace your watering.
Good advice. Do you have any other words of wisdom?
Not really. You've gardened through hot, dry summers before, like last summer and the summer before that. And there was 1988. Remember how bad that summer was? I know you remember it. Water to keep plants alive and remember that any plant that dies leaves a spot for a new plant. Also, really focus on fall planting. It's better for most plants.
Got it, Dr. Hortfreud. Now, can I continue my plea to June?
June, why do you try to be like August? Don't be something you aren't. We love you as June, with your gentle rains and cooler temps. Please drop the charade. Come home, June.